Online Dating - Remember You Are Allowed To Have Fun
submitted: Oct 25th 2009 |
by: JaydeJohanssen
Total views: 27 |
Word Count: 593 |
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All this advice about avoiding scams and predators when dating can leave you bewildered, and afraid to try it. Well, I am hear to remind you not to throw the baby out with the bath water. Its not all bad. Meeting people is not that hard and its not that scary.
So I am writing today to remind you dating isn't all about danger, or scammers, it's just meeting people. You are trying to meet people whose company you can enjoy. So here are my 3 big tips on how you can date using web based tools AND have fun.
Tip 1. Make a plan. You need to understand two things before you can make your plan. You need to understand the kind of person you are looking for. You also need to be aware of the type of experience you are looking for with that person.
You will get a lot of advice from people when you start to go down this route. IGNORE them. They have all kinds of different and irrelevant motivations for giving you their advice. You are the only one who knows what is right for you right now though.
Listen to yourself, and be true to yourself. You'll be ok. Specific dates and relationships may not work, but this is your journey to have, they are your mistakes and successes to have, they are your experiences to learn from, laugh and cry about.
My second tip addresses the dating site you join. You've done your thinking, you know what you want, so join the niche dating sites that specifically address the qualities you are looking for. That's what they are there for, to pre-qualify people so you don't waste your time.
General dating sites can be very hit and miss. You may end up spending all your time filtering through inappropriate emails and therefore have none left to date the people you like. So just use the niche sites. Some examples include: Asian dating sites, if eastern culture is important to you. Religious dating sites (Ie. Christian or Jewish) if morality in a partner is important. Adult dating sites if you are looking for a fun time, as opposed to a long time. There are all manner of niche sites, you'll be amazed at their variety.
My third and final tip is to always keep it safe. You'll never have a fun time if you're not feeling safe. So apply common sense and your own set of safety precautions to all real life dating experiences.
Dating has a number of stages, online dating adds a few extra stages. Each is a natural progression of "opening up" as trust is built. It starts with emails. Once trust is built, telephone numbers can be exchanged. Then when trust is built, dates in public places. Then, as more trust is built, private time together. There is no standard time scale for running through these progressions, its however fast the couple in the situation want it to be. If for any reason though, trust has not been built at one of the stages, do not progress to the next level of intimacy until it does. How can you ever feel safe if the trust doesn't exit?
Once you have met someone in real life, you really should reset your expectations of them to ZERO. Pretend you never contacted them on the internet and start dating them in exactly the same way you would date someone you met in society proper.
I hope that helps. Keep it simple, have fun and by following your instincts, have a safe dating experience to success.
About the Author
Jayde Johanssen has helped hordes find true love, by giving quality dating advice and giving dating site reviews. Get a totally unique version of this article from our article submission service
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